You can't explain this.

maybe you can explain this, but I would really rather not. Nice VPL's granny.

I feel like the victim could have been more truthful

(h/t thechive.com)

Even Wesley Snipes said, "Dammnnnnnnnnnnn"

Seriously.  This is what happens when white kids make videos of themselves playing the basketball game.


Anyone want to speculate on why Snipes is wearing a cycling hat?  I guess it makes sense if you are wearing biker shorts?

Happy St. Pats.

Something tells me her relationship with Dad...solid.

I am just curious if that is a duckface or just fat face?

child abuse

(h/t theChive.com)

Little early for junk

food.

The most careless of whispers

You are done. You're just done.

You are no Greg Jennings with that broke leg routine you got going on here. Just sad.

Just let this be a lesson if you grab a guys shirt and rock him straight in the noggin and he doesn't flinch...perhaps move along.

Nothing new just, Movin Like Bernie

I need like 6 friends to move like Bernie with me and we would just murder kids' parties everywhere (hit all the mitzvah's).

I was at a wedding last weekend and we got the usual electric slide and YMCA...sadly, no Bernie.

You can't explain this.

You can't explain this. I have tried. I would love to hear your comments as to your version of how the events unfolded that led to this picture.

White dunker. Not creative.

This has been making the interwebbing rounds. White kid looking to punch a Wonka golden ticket to the slam dunk fest.

"Hey guys I’m Jacob Tucker and I just finished up my senior year of basketball at Illinois College. This video was made in an attempt to get in the 2011 NCAA dunk contest. I’m 5’11″ with a 50 inch running vertical…. I want to send a special thanks to everyone that has helped this grow"

I love the parent reactions.

Not enough that this kid just ices the game after a three-step shuffle, but the parents are just godsmashed. Scoreboard operator was waiting for the ref to indicate it was a three. He didn't. But he did indicate an "and one" for the ages.

Friday Music to hang your hat on.

Mumford And Sons - The Cave

Stock photo of someone somewhere.  Probably not the perpetrator and probably not the air marshal either.

CNN-Delta Airlines
A woman said she was asleep when the passenger seated behind her, identified as Brian Louis Pomykala, woke her up by "forcibly fondling and grabbing her face and head and then gesturing toward his crotch area indicating that he needed some sex," according to the complaint.

The woman's companion sought help from flight attendants who alerted two air marshals on board the flight, the complaint says.

When they approached Pomykala and asked him to go to the rear of the plane to explain what happened, he said he was not going anywhere, court papers allege.

Pomykala then struck one of the air marshals in the throat "with a bladed, karate-style thrust strike" and followed with a choke hold move, according to the complaint.

Judo chop, you say?  Impressive.  This man wanted sex and sex was what he was going to get until the stupid air marshals had to intervene.

I am thinking those Sky Marshals must get some insane milage points.  I want sky marshal airline points.

I will no longer bitch about my day.

Honestly, thanks to those that are asked to pay the ultimate price.

Jews for Jesus...afterall.

Guardian
The pope has written a detailed and personal repudiation of the idea that the Jews were collectively responsible for the death of Jesus.

Oy Vey. You want for me to do believe this nonsense?

Finally. That pesky factoid has been looming over the Chosen People for awhile now. Time for everyone to celebrate, right. Right? Who's with me? The Jews, that's who.

Burn.

Stan the man Van Gundy- “I do chuckle a little bit when they complain about the scrutiny they get,” Van Gundy, a former Heat coach, told reporters in Orlando. “My suggestion would be if you don’t want the scrutiny, you don’t hold a championship celebration before you’ve even practiced together. It’s hard to go out yourself and invite that kind of crowd and celebration and attention, and then when things aren’t going well, sort of bemoan the fact that you’re getting that attention.”

You're right. Wait, what?

Who is using who? You know what, I don't care. You look like I could use a more confident approach to get you interested.

Strong work on whoever did this (re: too lazy to give actual credit)

Rascal Red Rover

"Red Rover, Red Rover, let diabetes take our left foot" (it sounded better in my head - it didn't really)

I think the other thing that I found to be fun is that clearly not all of these rascals are the same kind.  This means that at this particular Wal-Mart (just a hunch) that someone brought their own.  I guess this could be a Wal-Mart in the deep south where they have more rascals than "buggies." 

Wait. Where are you going?

I will take a dog over a cat any day. However, man's best friend didn't so much as give a shout out as to bailing on everyone. I thought they were supposed to warn of impending danger. Not this one. This dog George Constanza's his way out the door, leaving old women and children in his wake.

With no doggie door on the building, it serves this dog right. If there had been a doggie door, you might never have seen this guy again. Kinda serves him right. If you aren't going to warn us, you are going to be trapped in the rubble right along side us. Ass.

so sad to see bacon come between two people.

I would feel the same.

You know what dad's 'o the year do... (a versus match)

they don't setup college funds for future financial growth...they do this.  I tell myself that I didn't do this during snowpacolypse or whatever stupid name they came up with last seasons snow storms, based on the fact that I don't live in Utah or Russia.  Truth is...just too lazy.



It is awesome though.

Then there is this.



So, which Dad wins.  Snow slide dad or cake dad?

baby proofing your baby proofing.

this is just fitting (no not really fitting...I don't think I could walk around normally if that were the case).

We used to call a buddy of mine the "baby arm."  Apparently he wasn't packing anything.  There are baby's legs out there...

Thank God that is a pacifier in her hand.  Dodged a bullet on that one.

Further, I can only imagine the number of seconds it would take the average municipal/county authorities if you tried google search to find this picutre:
"child wearing con...."  nope
"children using..."  oops
"condoms and kids..." probably not a good idea

I am thinking maybe you just refer them to our site or just share verbally how titillating humorous it was.

Friday Music to hang your hat on.

Either way, we are playing it (it is my blog, I can do what I want).

Our first entry will be Wilco - Via Chicago.

If you already know this song, bully for you.  For those that don't, enjoy.





2-01 Via Chicago

Welcome Distraction

You can't touch this. Because it is in a third world country.

I know. You are waiting for him to crash into the perfectly placed doilies in the background. Not going to happen. You know what is happening. Magic. Pay attention at the 1:00 mark when he does what the Fresh Prince calls makin your neck work.

Halep's update, the shock heard round the world

There is a definite difference.  Let us investigate further...

versus

If you look closely, you can see the difference. I mean, she looks as though she is now a brunette. Women...you just never know what they are hiding (clearly their natural hair color).

I wonder if she has any miracle bras?  Further, that if she went into V.S. and bought some push-up number whether she gets hit by lightening while walking to her car?

today just sucks. I think I ate too much at lunch and now I am feeling all tired and stuff...

Yeah, so maybe your day wasn't just tops.  But, it could be worse.  You could be reduced to driving a blue (whatever the hell this car is).  Oh and have it completely wrecked by a crazed, shirtless, mental patient. 

I also like how the car in front of blue beater just kind sits there...probably oblivious to the entire world.  I don't blame the driver for not running over the dude.  Can you imagine?  He was just sitting in traffic and managed to piss this guy off.  Forget trying to run over him.  This fella would pull out a plasma torch and make a convertible out of my car and head.

Here is a hot tip for the mental patient.  All the blue cars you commit a battery against are never going to get you that missing tooth.  It just won't.

Caption contest versus - Grannies getting ill

versus

(h/t to the Chive-they do a great job)

this kid makes me feel inadequate

can you imagine watching this kid before having to go up against him?

I want to go to this kids wrestling matches just so I can yell out:

(Link) View more Ed Sound Clips and sweet!




I bet this kid wears a skeleton body suit for Halloween.