Anthony Lloyd, 20, was ordered off the park pitch for foul language but returned with the running power tool and tried to chop the hands off rival Paul Westwood while yelling: "I'm a crank."
"The victim's friend ran off, leaving him cornered by the defendant."
Lloyd began thrusting the chainsaw at Mr Westwood, cutting his chest.
Ms Plant added: "He tried to chop his hands off while Mr Westwood was defending himself. He then walked off."
Judge Neil Stewart sentenced Lloyd to 12 months' imprisonment, suspended for two years, and ordered him to attend a drug rehabilitation programme.
He said: "You had been drinking, you were unpleasant, you went away and then for some reason you brought back a chainsaw which was running.
I like how the prosecutor here subtly disparages the friend. You and I may be down like four flat tires, but if someone comes hunting us down with a chainsaw...I am Usain bolting it and hoping that you come in second.
I also am fond of the fact that the judge states that he was unpleasant. Like he was talking during a movie.
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